
As a young CEO and a mother of three, I’ve always felt a deep drive to succeed mostly because I didn’t have the kind of support that many people expect to have growing up. For most of my life, those who “should” have been there to support me weren’t, or the cost of that support was so high emotionally and mentally that I learned at a young age that I had to be my own support system.
This created a huge tension for me as a leader. As much as I knew I couldn’t do everything alone, I also struggled with asking for help. I didn’t want to burden others, and I certainly didn’t want to rely on people who weren’t fully invested. But over time, I realized something vital: some of the best support we get is the support we intentionally invest in.
This realization didn’t come overnight. It’s been a challenging and sometimes painful lesson to learn, and, if I’m honest, I’ve often run from it. I’ve run from my own need for help out of fear or pride, and I’ve seen how that hasn’t always led to the results I hoped for. But through this process of growth and healing, I’ve learned four key lessons that have been nothing short of life-changing.
Investing in Support Allows Us to Build Healthy Relationships
You Get a Better Experience and Product
Healthy Boundaries, Become Possible
Clarity on What Matters Most
There was a time when I didn’t think I deserved to invest in support, or I didn’t believe that anyone else could truly understand my needs. But now I know better. Choosing to invest in support—not just the kind I feel obligated to take, but the kind that actually adds value and aligns with my goals—has been one of the most empowering decisions I’ve made.
As a leader, CEO, and mom of three, I’ve learned that choosing support isn’t a sign of weakness; it’s a sign of strength. It’s not about relying on others out of desperation. It’s about creating a foundation of support that allows you to show up as your best self for the people and projects that matter most.
And yes, the journey to this place of growth has been messy. There have been moments of pain and discomfort. But each challenge has become an opportunity to learn more about myself, my needs, and the people who truly support me. By choosing the right kind of support, I’ve been able to cultivate healthy relationships, set clear boundaries, and make decisions that honor what matters most to me.
If you’re a busy leader like me, you’ve probably learned the hard way that asking for support isn’t always easy. But here’s the truth: If you want to lead effectively, you need it. And if you’re ready to stop running from your need for help, here’s a no-BS, direct approach to making this shift:
3-Step Practice to Start Investing in the Right Support
Step 1: Get Clear on What You Really Need
No more vague ideas like “I just need help.” It’s time to get real about what’s missing. Sit down and ask yourself: What’s stressing me out the most? Where am I constantly hitting roadblocks? What do I need to get out of my own way?
The goal here is clarity. Once you’re clear on what you need—whether it’s a mentor, a coach, or someone to help with specific tasks—write it down. If it’s not clear, you can’t expect the right support to show up.
Step 2: Own Your Need for Support
This one’s hard for many of us, myself included. Asking for help feels like a vulnerability you don’t want to show to the world. But guess what? Vulnerability isn’t weakness—it’s courage. Own the fact that you can’t do it all. Seriously. You’re not a superhero. The minute you let go of the “I got this” mindset, the better.
It’s okay to admit that you need support, and it doesn’t make you less of a leader. In fact, it makes you stronger. Reach out, be honest, and stop pretending that you don’t need others to thrive. If you don’t ask, you won’t receive.
Step 3: Invest in the Right Support
Here’s the kicker: Invest in support intentionally. Don’t settle for the people or services that are “just there.” Find the people who are genuinely excited to help you and aligned with your values and goals.
This means setting a budget for support, whether it’s a coach, a team member, or a service provider, and not feeling guilty about it. When you invest in the right support, you build better relationships because you’re not just “using” people—you’re honoring their time and energy. This mutual respect fosters trust and delivers better results.
Bonus: Don’t Backpedal
You’ve taken the first step by getting clear and asking for support. Now, don’t second-guess your decision when things get hard. Growth is uncomfortable, and you may be tempted to slide back into old habits. But if you stick with it, you’ll start to see how investing in the right support leads to healthier relationships, better work, and ultimately, a stronger leadership presence.
This process isn’t always easy, but it’s necessary for growth. Stop running from the discomfort and start leaning into it. Your leadership and your life will be stronger for it.
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